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Los Angeles, CA | A Latino gang member who tried to smuggle drugs and an M-16 into prison after he was arrested this week has died of his injuries reports the Los Angeles Chronicle. The man that is believed to be part of the notorious El Salvador-based MS-13 crime organization, also known as Mara Salvatrucha, has … Read more
Chesterfield, ME | A high school teacher from Maine was fired this week after allegedly performing oral sex on one of her students during Sex Education class. Peggy Sue Harvey, a 56-year-old woman that has taught at Bucksworth Junior High School for the past 22 years, has reportedly fallen victim to a severe nervous breakdown. … Read more
Denver, Colorado | A man with an extremely bad case of munchies was arrested last night after he broke into a pet shop and devoured over ten pounds of dog biscuits and dry food. Officers of the Denver Police Department arrived at the Dog Kingdom pet shop around 3:00 AM this morning after the store’s … Read more
Six employees of a fertility clinic in the city of Lanzhou, in the Northwestern Chinese province of Gansu, received sentences ranging from 8 to 25 years in prison after they were found guilty of using pig semen to fertilize dozens of women. Between June 2016 and March 2017, a total of 86 women who had paid 50,000 … Read more
A former security guard in a Detroit laboratory has confessed to ejaculating in the sanitized tanks used to produce hydrating face cream on more than 500 occasions over the last three years. 59-year old Larry Gordon was arrested this morning by officers of Detroit Police Department after he was caught on tape and confessed his actions to his employer. Mr. Gordon spent the last seven years … Read more
FBI agents made an astonishing discovery this morning while executing a search warrant at the residence of a Houston mortician: 3,178 embalmed human penises. The Federal Bureau of Investigation suspected 54-year old Dave Murray, an employee of the Harris County Morgue, of being implicated in an organ trafficking network. Investigating several reports of missing organs … Read more
Springfield, OH | An intoxicated school principal at Franklin Middle School was arrested this morning after literally defecating in front of hundreds of students during the pledge of allegiance. Andrew Whitmore, 53, was visibly under the influence of alcohol when he decided to throw down his pants and defecate on the schoolyard in front of … Read more
An Arkansas mall Santa was arrested this week after allegedly enticing dozens of underage children to touch his genitals. Little Rock Police Officers responded to the vicinity of Park Plaza Mall for a report of an intoxicated man dressed in a Santa Claus outfit within the mall who was allegedly touching children in an inappropriate … Read more
A heavily inebriated man was arrested last night by the Mobile Police Department (MPD) while engaging in sexual intercourse with animal figures of a Nativity scene outside the Trinity Methodist Church. 53-year old Boris Middleton was spotted last night by patrolling MPD officers while he was humping aggressively a fiberglass and resin donkey figure displayed in … Read more
The founder and director of the nonprofit organization Micropenises Anonymous was arrested this morning in Los Angeles for blackmailing and extorting money from hundreds of men who had turned to his organization for help. 29-year old Jared Smith has been for years an important advocate for his cause: trying to raise public awareness about the … Read more