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Washington, DC | A security guard of the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History was arrested this morning, for allegedly having sex with one of the mummies of the Egyptian exhibition. 44-year old James Monroe has worked as a night watchman for the reputed museum for the last nine years and was almost considered a model employee until his divorce two … Read more
St. Louis, Missouri | A 43-year-old woman was arrested this morning by the St. Louis Police Department after she tore off her husband’s genitals with her own teeth as an act of vengeance for an alleged infidelity. During her interrogation, Christina Palmer Anderson confessed that she had been planning her crime since she had surprised her husband performing oral sex … Read more
Washington, D.C. | A man from Virginia turned himself in at the FBI headquarters this morning, claiming that he was guilty of killing more than 30 people, including the 16th President of the United States, Abraham Lincoln. 71-year-old Leroy Timothy Anderson, claims he worked for 35 years as a “time-traveling assassin” for a secret governmental agency and says he … Read more
Dublin, Ireland | A British man who claimed to be the “real” Prince Harry and to have been forcibly replaced as a child by an impostor, was found dead this morning in his hotel room, in the seaside town of Dun Laoghaire, near the Irish Capital. The Garda Síochána (Irish police) was called on the site early this morning, after … Read more
Doha, Qatar | Customs officers at the Hamad International Airport, in the Qatari capital, have arrested a Yemeni man attempting to smuggle more than 12 kilograms (27 lbs) of sliced bacon hidden in his anal cavity. 53-year old Abd al Rahman Shamoun was spotted by a specially trained police dog, looking for drugs or pork meat on passengers and in … Read more
An employee of a McDonald’s restaurant in Canada was accused of stealing more than 80 lbs of chicken McNuggets from his employer, allegedly hiding them in his rectum to smuggle them out of his workplace. 31-year old Andy Brown was arrested this morning by the Ottawa Police after a cavity search revealed four condoms filled with frozen … Read more
The famous drag queen, actor and recording artist Rupaul, claims that Donald Trump grabbed his ass and genitals during a party in 1995. In an exclusive interview with the Hollywood Inquirer, Rupaul said that Mr. Trump “made a move” on him during an event celebrating the release of the movie To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar. … Read more
Atlanta, Georgia | A 32-year-old man went on a killing frenzy last night, after spending 36 hours in a row watching Walking Dead while doing drugs. According to the police, Kevin Fogarty was so badly intoxicated with crystal meth that he became convinced his apartment was surrounded by zombies. He equipped himself with an assault rifle, two pistols, a machete … Read more
Pretoria| An employee of the famous National Geographic magazine was arrested this morning in South Africa, for sexually assaulting a zebra while working in the Kruger National Park. Mr Fitzgerald was shooting a documentary film on Burchell’s zebras along with two other National Geographic employees and five local guides, when he left the group to “get a closer … Read more
Langley, Virginia | A major explosion occurred last night at the headquarters of the Central Intelligence Agency, igniting a fire which almost completely destroyed an annex of the building and led to the discovery of a suspected drug lab. The detonation took place around 11:30 pm last night. The powerful blast was heard for miles around the complex and sent plumes … Read more